Through a Mirror Darkly

If you've not been hiding under the bed in a pair of soiled pants, you'll know that Charlie Brooker has released a series of three surreal stories, to the general delight of all. Well, not everyone, I suppose. But is it really as good as legions of starry eyed fans make out? Is it the genius missed by simpletons like myself? Is people's biggest issue the fact that Brooker is a dickhead anyway?

This will contain spoilers. I thought I'd warn you, because I'm definately one of the good-guys...

Black Mirror: The National Anthem


The first in Charlie's 'darkly twisted tales', The National Anthem sees a popular young British princess kidnapped, and the ransomer's demand is that the Prime Minister of the day has sexual intercourse with a pig live on national TV. That's about it, really. It doesn't have much more to it than that. Cue 'race against the clock to save beautiful princess from evil psychopath', where the price of failure means that someone is going to get nasty with a piggy. Long story short, the good guys lose, and the PM bows to public pressure and bumps uglies with the squealer, saving the princess but losing his marriage. Which is understandable, I suppose.

A pig for that? Really?

But is it Art?

I've had people tell me that Brooker's National Anthem is pretty stupid. It is based on an entirely improbable, unbelievable premise that isn't improved by beastiality, if that could potentially make a situation better. It's a fair cop, really, but it misses the point. The National Anthem is clever because it takes a surreal, pointless kidnap request and turns it into something that is hauntingly familiar. Edge of consciousness familiar, but familiar all the same. And it creates a very real, very believable dilemma for the Prime Minister. He is not negotiating for some random British yatchsmen captured off Somalia, but for a princess loved by the nation. He is not making political concessions, handing over huge quantities of cash or releasing terrorists onto the streets. All he has to do is sacrifice his dignity.

And theres the reality in it. It is a pointless ask, but with some very deep, sinister implications. I'm not sure I need to describe in any great detail the ramifications of filming David Cameron taking a pig from behind, and what that would do to national and global politics. I think you could work that out for yourself. The premise is believable. People have done political acts that would appear just as pointless, particularly someone like Abbie Hoffman. Just because it's stupid and crude doesn't automatically make it wrong. The portrayal of popular opinion and the cruelty of the masses is entirely believable. The role of the media and internet is something we've come to expect.

The problem rests with the believability of the characters, not the scenario. The National Anthem coerces an innocent, reluctant, but ultimately heroic Prime Minister into an act of degredation. But unfortunately, that's the least believable part. It wouldn't happen, and somewhere, at the back of your mind, you know it wouldn't.

The final twist is at the end, when the Princess is freed half an hour before the deadline by her captor, who then commits suicide. He is a famous artist, going for one last triumphant exhibition. And here is the second and third problem with The National Anthem.

Princess Susanne, despite being released prior to the deadline, is not discovered until after the PM has done the nasty with a pig. Not for a considerable time afterwards. This is because everyone is indoors watching the broadcast. It wouldn't happen. Would the police hold everything so they could gather round a TV screen? Would not a single member of the public be so repulsed they'd decide to get some shopping done? Would every business in London shut down, leaving post-apocalyptic empty streets? 'Go home lads, take the day off from McDonalds and watch that weird thing that's happening on TV'. No, it wouldn't happen.

And the final problem, rounding back to the beginning. Is it art?

I'm not going to get bogged down in discusing the artistic merit of beastiality, but the wider implications of 'is it art?' that Brooker touches on, but never really explores. No discussion of artistic merit takes place, despite that being the whole point. No scathing criticism of people who enter unmade beds into the Tate. No one looking at a beach made of digestive biscuits and going 'This is fucking ridiculous'. Nothing highlighting the fact that people stare at a collection of empty suitcases and talk about the deeper meaning, and everyone runs with it because they're too frightened of social judgement to act in an non-pretentious intellectual kind of way.

It's a wasted opportunity, but maybe that's the point. Brooker has created a situation whereby a man has to fuck a pig. People will criticise it for being unrealistic, crude and stupid. People will also stare at a mechanical dildo ejaculating into a McDonald's cup and call it genius. Students will write essays about piles of useless junk.

Therein is the biggest problem. The National Anthem shocks, entertains, and leaves people with too much time on their hands weighing up the reality of a situation and blogging about it on the internet. But in doing so, it doesn't get to grips with the point of the story and the whole 'is it art?' idea. In creating a nightmare scenario dreamed up by a crazy artist and then never discussing it, The National Anthem fails to confront itself.

Tonight or Tomorrow will follow Black Mirror: 15 Million Merits, and how in enjoying it and it's criticism of fake society, we kind of missed the point.