Revenge of the Big Society

It has been a few weeks of cuts*, Big Society, and dubious political posturing. One lady, deciding that the voluntary sector was something she'd have a go at, became an unwitting celebrity and mercenary warrior of justice in Northampton. Watch the video, it is well worth the time. Armed with only her handbag, she plunged into a gang of six sledgehammer wielding would-be robbers. The charge was furious, the momentum unstoppable, the carnage - unthinkable. Caught unawares, the gang fled with one being dragged down by onlookers. Unlucky day for him.

She claimed that she was unhappy with people standing there, doing nothing, allowing crime to go unchallenged. My theory is that people would rather take on a gang of thugs armed with giant hammers than endure any more bad news from Westminister. A kind of suicide by conscience.

But she isn't the only member of the Big Society to launch a fightback against perceived injustice and apathy. The students are revolting, Unions are balloting for strike action. In it's own hilarious fashion, the media gives us the impression that society itself is falling apart at the seems. It got so bad that  Liverpool decided to 'opt out' of being part of the Big Society altogether,* stating:

"How can the City Council support the Big Society and its aim to help communities do more for themselves when we will have to cut the lifeline to hundreds of these vital and worthwhile groups? I have therefore come to the conclusion that Liverpool City Council can no longer support the Big Society initiative, as a direct consequence of your funding decisions."

But Liverpool is not alone. Manchester has joined the revolt, in a somewhat round-about way, by announcing - rather unhelpfully for pretty much everyone, Tory and worker alike - a list of cutbacks so long that they are jockeying for the position currently held by the metaphorical piece of string. BBC News seem particularly irate at the lost of public toilets. Yes, after reporting losing 17% of it's workforce and 26% of it's children's budget, closing swimming pools and libraries and all manner of horrible things, most of the vehemence is saved for the lost of the toilet. But I suppose you'd have to get to watch BBC News 24 to get the full humour of a newscaster saying "AND ALL BUT ONE OF IT'S PUBLIC TOILETS!"

Maybe he had a bad holiday in Manchester.

Even someone who thought it sounded good is thinking twice about the whole idea. After all, how can you run a vovoluntary sector with no money. The thing politicians seem to miss about the voluntary sector is the fact that, despite not having to pay anyone, it is not free. In fact, it is relatively expensive. No one volunteers to man a cardboard box on an industrial estate in Scunthorpe. People volunteer to run soup kitchens and the like. And that costs money.

Even the bankers are livid about an extra levy, although the Bonus Tax thing that happened last year won't be happening this year. Which actually means they save money. They probably feel a bit betrayed by the Tories. Just like people feel betrayed by Labour or the Lib-Dem's. In fact, the best way not to feel betrayed is to become a nihilistic cynic. The first time in history this is actually a political advantage.

Just to complete the round-up of today's carnival of faliure, there are some notorious bastards that are actually enjoying watching it all burn down around them, Cambridge University has decided that it doesn't want to dilute it's excellence with the knuckle-dragging proles, and has decided that an opportunity to get more money is an opportunity to be taken. Fees will rise to £9,000, but 'disadvantaged' students will only have to pay £6,000, which is only double the current cap.

All in all, I hope the Tory plans die a horrible and painful death. Unfortunately, the problem we're seeing is that they're almost like Kamikaze policies. Even in the act of their very own self-destruction, they'll try and take out as many of us as possible. I'd like to summarize, or post a witty quote, a final thought, or something, but I can't really think of one, so you can have this terrifying image instead.




"As the spending cuts bite, Cat unemployment hits 9%."

 * The only thing that hasn't been cut by Tory policies is my lawn. I feel somewhat short-changed that they missed the obvious one.
 *That's right. Apparently, it is now possible to opt out of society. I'm gonna get an application form.